Humidity Deemed Valuable Natural Resource, Politicians Unsure How To Exploit It

In a windfall of good luck for the state of Georgia, excessive humidity has been deemed a “valuable natural resource” by the American Council on Natural Liquidity. “Several states in the southeast stand to gain substantial funds through the leveraging of this natural resource through the humidity value index.” said ACNL spokesperson Rachael Strickland.

As to what the humidity could be used for experts say that it has a myriad of uses. “Imagine the benefits for people with thin, volume-less hair.” said Strickland. “People pay top dollar for this kind of humidity at a spa, and those saunas don’t even come with the free organic pollen you get from Georgia this time of year!”

Georgia congressman and former Pooler mayor Earl Leroy “Buddy” Carter voiced a familiar sentiment when probed on the issue. “I continue to support an all-of-the-above energy policy,” he said in an email Tuesday. Carter has recently been one of an outnumbered group of Georgia politicians that support offshore oil drilling.