New Kessler Hotel Planned, Bar To Be Staffed With Slave Labor

Today The Kessler Hotel Group announced plans to open another new hotel in the Riverfront district of Savannah. The hotel will feature a bar with a special theme; it is to be staffed entirely with slave labor.

“I think they wanted to do something to celebrate Savannah’s rich history of cultural diversity, and this city was built on the backs of slaves, so it just made sense,” said bar manager Terry Lovelace.

The group said this would be a new sister location to its recently opened bar in Plant Riverside District. “Everyone seems to love the new bar there. We figured we’d run with the idea,” said Lovelace.

A statement released today announced the new bar will be called History Nouveau, explaining that “our high-end clientele really want history to come alive around them.”

“No one’s getting paid except me,” explained Lovelace “But the workers are happy. We take care of them and love them and they love us, so I think this idea will catch on, especially overseas.”

Labor law groups have taken interest in the planned bar. When questioned what the Kessler group would do to avoid labor laws, Lovelace explained, “We think Trump is gonna win in November, and we don’t open ‘til February. There shouldn’t be a problem by then.”